Can I get a witness?

See the thing about the forum is it triggers something in me that makes me want to be seen. Like I need others' to witness what I'm experiencing in order for it to be "real" or make sense. Frankly I don't think it needs to make sense, but it does increase my consciousness when I understand it so having to think through it to type it out helps me anchor my own thoughts. That's good then. But I still don't want to fall into the trap of feeling like I need to share what I'm learning or that it will be wasted.

Is that a trap or is it real? I think it's a trap because remember, this whole earth exercise is between ME and me... my Godself and all its components I AM and my inner child, Carissa who is walking this out with me (including all our stations of identity). 

Let's keep chipping away.

This morning I saw 4:44 and my AG pick was Messier 55 the Summer Rose Star. It's 12:26 now.
12:34
Rosemary - blood codes - HGU - spinning

Messages from the universe:
https://ascensionglossary.com/index.php/Embodiment_Starts_with_Body_Awareness

LISTEN.

1:11 12:43 (I've had a bunch of numbers - I just haven't been writing them down. 9:09 8:08 and 7:07 and 10:00 and 10:01 (mirror) etc.

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Posted on forum ALSO:

I loved and appreciated every drop of this thread - very resonant and supportive. Ascension symptoms have been off the charts this year. Seems to go hand in hand with what Lisa said this winter about it being a "void year" for some of us. Lots of shadows to work with, density to be purged, shifts to surrender to.

Just now as I was breathing in my hammock I was nudged to come share that there are some very supportive copper light codes available at sunrise right now. Must be around 6am where I live. For a couple years I've noticed rose-gold support while sungazing at sunrise and sunset but there appear to be distinctive copper elements that have come online to support us now. It's like the rose-gold but a little orangier. I need to re-confirm but I think the rose-gold is still there (along with the other gifts -ray and light codes- coming through).

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5:05 I don't have words for this yet but I am undergoing a powerful shadow clearing experience - Paul held me in love and held space to help me begin to connect with the sexual trauma I experienced - and what came up was me as that toehead little girl with a bowl haircut. The basement on Bullard Rd. The basement door as one of those that are kind of diagonal and you pull the doors up and then walk down the stairs which triggers the song "cellar door and we'll be happy friends forever more more more... come slide down my rainbow into my cellar door..." or something. Rainbarrell?

I have so much pressure in my sinuses and in my solar plexus. Felt like my throat chakra was really damaged from forced oral sex as a child. Feels like I was purposely designed to dissociate and fracture so I no longer felt my body and soul - to DISCONNECT. I became numb... I am still. And then faking it to go along with expectations. 

WHO AM I?

5:15