Tyrone

I'm often thinking of Tyrone. Trying to send good energy his way - praying for his energy body - for his chakra alignment for his LIGHT and LOVE and HEALING. I have deep love for him and wonder if we are still connected. Do I need to cut the cord between us? Didn't I already in Dr. Lara's mediations? He is important to me. Is it a mind trick or a spiritual battle or just because we ARE one and he IS my soul mate and twin flame? I am so grateful to him and for our experiences - especially for his courage in leaving - it was necessary. I had fallen from grace. I was not ... I was going to say I was not on the path, but I WAS... it was my path...and he had to find his. We had gotten tangled and confused. I was looking for God in flesh and I am prone to it - even now - always. I'm just re-learning or being led or given the opportunity to let go and connect with spirit... but I still choose flesh/earth when I should be meditating, praying. Praying for others is the key. Service to others. LOVE. I want to be a channel for Love. I am God, I am Sovereign, I am Free. I want to love Michael. Michael is my husband and my teacher and my opportunity to practice. I shouldn't even be thinking of Tyrone. Tyrone might be a trick. From the get-go he might have been a trick and just like my beloved earth family says, he may have been taking advantage of me. But I don't think so. I think we are both indigos and searching for God and meaning and doing the work and figuring out life and if we could figure out how to do it together we'd be much more effective and powerful but we both get wrapped up in the flesh. Anyway, I pray for his wholeness and wellness and forgiveness and LOVE. Bless him, Abba. Lead him to resources that nourish his soul. Water him with happiness and may JOY burst forth in his heart. Heal his pain. Are we here to transmute darkness? Yes, but there is plenty that comes through us - we have to heal our own timelines and families first while at the same time being a beacon of light and a homing device witnessing other worshippers and bringing joy to our Creator. We are co-creators on the leading edge of creation... WE ARE.

ps. Today I was beckoning Tyrone to send me a message on Facebook. He sent me a message a few years ago that was filled with pain and anger and I responded in my holier-than-thou "I forgive you, please forgive me" way....  but I feel like I've touched the pain a bit more and have a little more understanding (though I can't connect with it right now, but I know my soul did some work in that realm)...anyway, I hope if he gives me another chance, he will meet a higher vibration and that LOVE will heal him and us. But he didn't write and I have no way to get in touch with him and I don't believe I should try to - the ball is in his court. And I want him to be happy and married and have a life and love and family in LIGHT. But I also secretly wish he would wait for me. But I don't want him to wait for Michael to die. I don't want Michael to die. Michael is my BEST FRIEND and the BEST HUMAN and I don't want anything to happen to him. I wish he would find happiness and a woman who would be the RIGHT woman for him. I'm not. I love him and we are great friends and partners in many ways, but we are not soul mates. But we ARE here for lessons in each other's lives - to learn from each other.... and Michael did have a 25year marriage and kids with Judy...but I wish he could have someone who enjoyed watching TV with him and serving him and supporting him in his classes and being frugal together, etc. OH and having SEX. (I give blowjobs but I'm not into sex.) Anyway, I'm just not her. But I love him and he needs to be loved.

The Universe will work it all out. But I fear that it will take Michael. He seems to be getting old and wrinkled and spotted fast. But it's probably my fear. I'm trying to just see and enjoy his VIBRANCE. He laughs and cares for animals and is passionate about kettle corn and studying for his class. He's so sweet and a hard worker. He's handsome and talented - he built the EggPlant chicken house and fixed so many things. He's just the most wonderful human and I love him so.