Not very thorough EJE

 Suggested for today: Emotion Journaling Exercise

I guess I'll dump .... I don't know. It's suggested. I'm TRYING to be kind and solar and loving. I also feel that I have to explain myself or make points or do what I feel I should do (like walk the dogs or my half assed take them to the dog park). I don't feel like anything is wrong. Am I creating shame or am I being honest and feeling through discordant energy? Am I honest? That's the most important question.

I feel behind. I feel disconnected. I feel apprehensive about being away from Paul and our family for 6 days. I don't really want to have sex. I just want to rest in each other's arms. I don't want to be pulled at. I don't want to pull. I just want to rest in love.

I'm tired. It's 20/5:00 (4/20/22 5:00) and I am waiting for Paul to get to work. He likes to buy Red Bull which doesn't make sense but who am I to judge him? We'll do what we want to do when we are ready. It doesn't make sense that I eat sugar when I know it damages my God-connection and body, but I haven't put my foot down. This is my work and nothing anyone else can say can change that. 

That was helpful to think through. Just LET GO. "Do me and let Paul BE."

___

9:21 Yesterday I saw TWO flying herons. One from the yard flying over the Ranch and one when I was driving down Steven's Chappel Rd.

https://www.sonomabirding.com/heron-symbolism/

On the way home I saw a bunch of 4 vultures eating some roadkill. They didn't move very fast and one as it was flying, flew in front of me right at windshield level - I wasn't going to hit it, but it was so close and a marvelous view of my friend!

3:01 - I saw another heron flying over the pond - low to the pond but big flaps - today! That article about the heron is pretty fabulous and I'm honored to get to experience heron's beautiful energy.  Purity, sacred, balance, stability, wisdom, self-reliance, etc... Represents Ra (the sun god in Egypt)... so much good stuff there!

My AG pick was very good and relevant today too:
https://ascensionglossary.com/index.php/Subconscious_Programming

Feeling like I'm very much called back to work on this Red Wave programming - the 1D healing. Another shot at healing subconscious wounds.

I looked at Tyrone's page today and I intend to cut all cords with him. I feel sad for him. I don't feel that he's my "person", but I do feel he's my brother and I pray that he finds his way. I'm so grateful for Paul and hope he and I can carry on healing one another in Love.