Meditations and stuff

Just pulled this meditation: Genetic Mutation of Mind Control Correction

Last night I pulled the "Removal of Crucifixion Implants" again in the middle of the night. A twofer in ONE DAY. 

12:44
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Waffee was a magical experience!
Paul has a pretty good job possibility!
Paul pushed me around in the canoe in the sun which was fun. We... mostly he... meditated. But it was good.
Needing heart healing and opening. Deep breaths. Ear.

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Posted in ESF for first time in a long time:

Dear Rosemary and Katie, Thank you. Such intense and tumultuous times we are sharing!

Rosemary, your dream definitely resonates with me in that I feel that Paul and I are working in that area with Louisiana too - lots of black magic. Two days ago I believe I witnessed an artifact be ejected from my beloved that was like a mixture of a spikey grenade and voodoo doll. Paul was born and raised in that area and I have felt assigned to the Mississippian indigenous tribes (in a way).... so it feels like my consciousness could have been in the car with you.

I feel concerned hearing how we were having that "experience in the opposite direction" because I think it's true in a way - I have really been feeling like I've digressed so much in the last few weeks especially - like I've really lost some significant battles, giving more space/wormholes to entities that are trying to kill - split - destroy both Paul and I (including "us").

Katie, I've also been feeling the anti-HG splitter tech - desperately trying to dismantle and send it out! Last night I was very weak - my pain body was in high gear (I know why now - I got my period overnight. I think it started at 3:33/3 ! I was woken up and wrote it down!) Anyway... I don't think it's just me that is super-prone to pain body attacks right before our period and this one was a doozie! Paul and I had the most non-sensical, soul-destructive, emo-drama, walk-away-in-the-cold-and-dark, I'm-packing-my-bags, horrible night! All the old players were there with their tricks and gaslighting, and dramatizing, and ego-inflating, and self-centered whining, and their big shiny scissors that they were using to shred BOTH of our lightbodies!

If it weren't for ES, especially the daily Gathering Page bounty where God whispers targeted encouragement and insight to my heart, I would feel like I had been flushed down the toilet. But I'm not. I'm here. I know I'm in the midst of battle and I need to cling to hand/footholds (spiritual tools) and just do my best to keep my heart and eyes open. I need to stay awake. I need to see the TRUTH of what's going on here and why. I've been given insight that it is related to another level of healing wing trauma for both of us. For me 7D is up (Arcturus is beaming rainbow aurora light at me every day, my left shoulder is branded, crucifixion implants on my left side are pinging and aching)... and I feel that my family is supporting me from the stars (and here on earth)! I'm grateful to get to participate with awakening Albion and I just need to keep putting one foot in front of the other, even if I look like a tattered mess - I can't give up this time. I can't lay down and die this time.

Mostly I just have to keep begging for help. And releasing - crying - purging the emotions and densities. I need to see the distortions. Overcome the negative ego impulses. This IS where the rubber meets the road. I have to just keep working the tools - frankly I've gone back to the beginning to read the Krystal Aegis and think that's exactly what I need right now.

Whoo - I'm sorry for the dump but I needed to share. I've wanted to share in the container but haven't known where to begin. Thank you for the place to drop it. I know our family is with me always but there is power and love here that magnifies healing.

I've been pretty active in dream-state as well.

3 nights ago I had a dream where my father had my sister and I on leashes, presumably to partake in sexual activities.

Another night I was walking with my dad in snow covered mountains and it was so bright that it kept blowing out my vision like if you had a camera aperture open too much. I was trying to get back to some clothes.

I think lots of sexual healing opportunities. My vagina has been itching like crazy but it appears to be the trauma retracing itch (I have gotten that over the years - it's from somewhere deeper and frankly I want to scratch my genitals off. I thought it might be candida getting crazy - parasites partying. But I don't think so. And in general I think I'm also just getting some etheric work done on my female anatomy which Lisa mentioned may happen.

I had a good few days this past week where most of the night a Ghost song called "Monstrance Clock" was playing all night - the part that says "come together, together as a one" just repeated over and over and over. (It continues to say "come together for lucifer's son" but that part wasn't on repeat)... the music is obviously satanic in nature and I am curious if it's an attack (or battle for my consciousness) or me working with the satanic and luciferian energies.

Anyway, lots of activity but nothing else in particular is coming up to share now.

Much love to all!
Carissa