Love Myself

I had a transcendent time sitting in the wooden adirondack chair out front - naked - in the rain and thunder and lightning last night. I spent some of that time remembering to love ME. To come back to love. 

My love.

My time with Paul is spent trying to make him happy - do what he wants in order that he might "return the favor" one day. But it is an endless suck. And there is gaslighting, manipulation, control, passive-aggressive, and overall sick and negative.

I don't feel heard, respected, or appreciated, and I am operating from a deficit.

Come back to ME. To my heart. Love myself.