Thank you for sharing this Vincent… it is helping me a lot too. I can relate to what you are sharing and know I have experienced that too. I gave myself away to it intentionally in 2011 (though it was cloaked as an angel of light - literally, but it was the spirit of lust and I let it have me). I interacted with it some in my life prior to that as well when I used to look at the personals on craigslist and just sat in the slimy thick feel of that energy and let it excite me. I have a very dysfunctional relationship with sex - often I would end up having a melt-down mid-sex… my poor first husband…and second husband… I would start laugh/crying in the middle… just losing it. My poor current husband too - it’s been terrible and this last year I’ve been celibate (for now while I am healing and will revisit in DRT).
I have a shameful obsession (sometimes when it hits my head) with people’s bodies. Even animal bodies. A deep curiosity and I always want to look at their private parts but also DON’T because it’s not right, but then I wonder why it’s not right and wonder if I need to look to take away its power. It’s just a bondage loop. And there is a spirit of lust behind it pulling the strings. It’s like what I was taught men think when they can’t look away from a woman and I can follow their thoughts and get into their dirty mind if I want to. (I don’t want to.) I just sometimes think and wonder about everyone… mostly just what they look like naked and I know there are tunnels that I can go down into lust …. I can just tap in to that mindset… or not. Now and then I feel tempted to get just a taste of it. (I’m referring to allowing my mind to go there…never any physical action.) I don’t think I do, but I must if I haven’t ejected this thing completely yet. I DO have very strong resistance to it though… so it’s like that phrase “what you resist persists”… so maybe it’s my strong resistance and shame reaction that keeps it hooked in. Yesterday I was helping my husband at a local flea market and everything was hunky dory and fine and then this “lens” hit me and I all of a sudden started thinking about people’s bodies and privates. I try to shake it off and am usually successful, but I appreciate understanding that it may be linked to that device or creature. So I desire to (a.) build awareness (b.) stop thinking it’s “me”, it’s not. (c.) compassionate witness (d.)… oh… pretty much I just need to do the mental discipline technique!
The 5 Steps to Negative Ego Reprogramming:
1. RELABEL – Identify the negative thought or emotion as a distorted pattern of negative ego consciousness. This Fear is my Negative Ego. This is not the real me.
2. RE-ATTRIBUTE – Disidentify from the thought or emotion as you. As you begin to master your emotional states, you can begin to choose. I am the eternal being, not my thoughts or emotions.
3. REFOCUS – Move yourself out of the situation, environment or the trigger for that thought. Go for a walk, listen to music, change your focus. Affirm: Not my will but Divine will.
4. REVALUE – Revalue the power you have given this thought or emotion to rule your life. See it for what it truly IS. Limiting you. Disempowering you. Robbing you of inner peace and fulfillment as a Divine being. Get behind ME, Ego! I AM that I AM!
5. REQUEST Help – Commit to expressing Higher Emotion and Living your Soul Purpose. Ask for help from Spirit. Work your tools. Be here now!
Anyway, thank you for this. It’s coming up for my healing too. My session last week revealed this thing and now the understanding to go with it. Thanks be to God! Such support here! Bless you and best wishes as you evict this terrible creature!
With Love and appreciation,
Carissa
Why?
I don't know... it validates me.
Why do you need validation?
I don't know. I don't. I guess. (I still think I do.)
Watch this and allow it to be ripped out at the roots.
I AM WITH YOU ALWAYS EVEN UNTO THE END OF THE AGE
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