11:23
City 4 Square meditation is all about TRAUMA healing! AMAZING! I pulled it AGAIN last night. Two nights in a row. God loves me so much. I'm going to listen to it again today too.
Bread isn't the best, but maybe a wrap with roast beef and herbs wouldn't be so bad. I can look for roast beef in the store. But it's not GOOD wholesome meat... that's the problem with "cold cuts"...they have chemicals and who knows what else on top of hormone-injected animals that have been tortured and murdered. Not good.
OH GOD. We need to fix this world.
OH GOD. We need to fix this world.
In general I need to surrender desire. Desire... want... of anything shows a dissatisfaction of God's blessings. Instead of trusting God to lead, I'm running after my own desires. My own lusts. I am fully provided for and given all that I need. When I start running after my own lusts which are usually the results of psychic attack and mental implants OR resistance to something that is "uncomfortable", then I ... what is that word? That Christian word? is it "grieve the Holy Spirit"? I guess that's it. There was some passage where Jesus said that you shouldn't ___ the holy spirit... that you can ___him all you want, but not GOD. I can't find it.
Anyway... I need to repair the pathways where I compromised that which God told me to do and I need to do everything (or not do everything) perfectly in alignment with my guidance. Number one so I can strengthen my guidance and number to so I can walk the path laid out before me in order to serve the earth and this mission to the best of my ability. I flubbed it up before. I don't want to do that again. Listen to GOD. Don't compromise for PEOPLE or for my own flesh.
There is grace and understanding here, I feel it, from God. It's all part of the walk... but times are getting serious so let me put off all the things that slow me down (yes Paul) and run the race before me in spirit and in truth!
This one reminds me of the pearl. And also a reminder that THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN IS EVERYTHING... following GOD is EVERYTHING!!!!
Anyway... I need to repair the pathways where I compromised that which God told me to do and I need to do everything (or not do everything) perfectly in alignment with my guidance. Number one so I can strengthen my guidance and number to so I can walk the path laid out before me in order to serve the earth and this mission to the best of my ability. I flubbed it up before. I don't want to do that again. Listen to GOD. Don't compromise for PEOPLE or for my own flesh.
There is grace and understanding here, I feel it, from God. It's all part of the walk... but times are getting serious so let me put off all the things that slow me down (yes Paul) and run the race before me in spirit and in truth!
This one reminds me of the pearl. And also a reminder that THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN IS EVERYTHING... following GOD is EVERYTHING!!!!
Thank you.
___
3:24 I will not fracture. I am strong. I AM STRONG. I just walked to the mailbox and around the back pasture singing a beautiful song of strength, redemption, and healing... in native/indigenous light language and it was very empowering. I almost fractured. I feel the attack and draw to lose my mind over this... to give over my mind over this. No. I choose to let GOD LEAD. I don't want to be involved. I want to live in peace and joy and allow God's will to be done in all things.
I had to lay down and moan some. Some seepage of tears but there is a lifetime of lifetimes of pain below this. Meditate. Breathe. Take in the sun. Hydrate. All of these will help.
You need YOU now, (clear BM!) not other people. Remember what God said, "SIT IN YOUR STILL POINT AND LET EVERYTHING UNFOLD AROUND YOU". So that's it.
Michael's phone and all the interference and noise was designed to upset me... sending static into my lightbody. I felt it. I felt the static in the dryer too. I DO NOT CONSENT TO STATIC or ATTACK of any sort. I AM GSF!!!
I will not fear "death hornets" or whatever Robert called them. They will not harm me. We are on the same team. We are integrating polarities ... yellow and black ... this is our job. They are my friends and totems as well, whatever they are.
I had to lay down and moan some. Some seepage of tears but there is a lifetime of lifetimes of pain below this. Meditate. Breathe. Take in the sun. Hydrate. All of these will help.
You need YOU now, (clear BM!) not other people. Remember what God said, "SIT IN YOUR STILL POINT AND LET EVERYTHING UNFOLD AROUND YOU". So that's it.
Michael's phone and all the interference and noise was designed to upset me... sending static into my lightbody. I felt it. I felt the static in the dryer too. I DO NOT CONSENT TO STATIC or ATTACK of any sort. I AM GSF!!!
I will not fear "death hornets" or whatever Robert called them. They will not harm me. We are on the same team. We are integrating polarities ... yellow and black ... this is our job. They are my friends and totems as well, whatever they are.
__
17:44 4:44
___
It's now 6:21 on the 17th and I need to share some miracles. Number 1, I pulled the "City 4 Square Encryption" for the THIRD NIGHT IN A ROW last night... out of a HUGE stack of cards that I shuffled... God is so good to me. It's all about trauma healing and so perfect.
After or during that mediation trauma came up... in the form of Moses getting sick and me getting an anxiety attack with him. Both of us had diarrhea and all my nerves were shaking and I was chilled and so anxious... an opportunity to surrender myself and Moses. I did send a text to Page when Moses was panting so bad but she didn't answer and I'm so glad she didn't. I needed to just be present with what WAS. It was a huge lesson. Hard to recount. The theme was surrender and letting go and entrusting all to God and just being present. These dogs are not MY dogs... we get to do life together and I can do the best I can, but ultimately I am NOT in control and I need to release control. There are Seed Fears attached to all these that are coming up for healing. Grateful to God, Guidance and our teams, including Moses... and Rue was helping too.
This morning I talked to Ryan and Sarah and had an amazing, healing discussion and met Bailey, the dog who attacked us and she was SO SWEET and kind. She kissed me on the lips and rolled over on her belly and put her head in my chest... just really really sweet. A beast behind a fence and I have to watch out for her, but she's like Rue... nice to people as long as she's not behind a fence. We'll see what Wendy does but I'm glad that it's over for me. I feel that much healing has come from it and much opportunity to choose love and forgiveness.
Made Yellow Curry. It wasn't great.
I'm missing Michael quite a bit.
Tired. Didn't go to bed until about 1am last night and up at 6. I got a 1 hr nap this morning, but need more. I did an amazing OmniLov meditation about 1D Krystallah something... pulled the card and it was perfect! COULDN'T listen to their update... it was too much... too heavy... I started to listen but am not strong enough yet.
Began Charlotte transcription finally.
After or during that mediation trauma came up... in the form of Moses getting sick and me getting an anxiety attack with him. Both of us had diarrhea and all my nerves were shaking and I was chilled and so anxious... an opportunity to surrender myself and Moses. I did send a text to Page when Moses was panting so bad but she didn't answer and I'm so glad she didn't. I needed to just be present with what WAS. It was a huge lesson. Hard to recount. The theme was surrender and letting go and entrusting all to God and just being present. These dogs are not MY dogs... we get to do life together and I can do the best I can, but ultimately I am NOT in control and I need to release control. There are Seed Fears attached to all these that are coming up for healing. Grateful to God, Guidance and our teams, including Moses... and Rue was helping too.
This morning I talked to Ryan and Sarah and had an amazing, healing discussion and met Bailey, the dog who attacked us and she was SO SWEET and kind. She kissed me on the lips and rolled over on her belly and put her head in my chest... just really really sweet. A beast behind a fence and I have to watch out for her, but she's like Rue... nice to people as long as she's not behind a fence. We'll see what Wendy does but I'm glad that it's over for me. I feel that much healing has come from it and much opportunity to choose love and forgiveness.
Made Yellow Curry. It wasn't great.
I'm missing Michael quite a bit.
Tired. Didn't go to bed until about 1am last night and up at 6. I got a 1 hr nap this morning, but need more. I did an amazing OmniLov meditation about 1D Krystallah something... pulled the card and it was perfect! COULDN'T listen to their update... it was too much... too heavy... I started to listen but am not strong enough yet.
Began Charlotte transcription finally.
Brought Charcoal over last night to help her "break the broody". No more broody chickens!!
No comments:
Post a Comment