Going Inward

Feels like I'm called inward now too.

This whole THING is between me and Me and we need to get our heart on straight. 

Fear of what others think. Mental obsessions about what could be. Striving to be good. All mental constructs and part of the masculine body which is ripe for reconstruction.

It's time to lay all that down. Let's do this together, Love. 

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I'm pretty sure I mentioned that I thought my anger... the punch... represented a phase of the grieving process and today You provided the rest of the list through a post Rosemary put out there:

. 

The 7 stages of grief

• Shock and denial. This is a state of disbelief and numbed feelings.
• Pain and guilt. ...
• Anger and bargaining. ...
• Depression. ...
• The upward turn. ...
• Reconstruction and working through. ...
• Acceptance and hope

I think I MAY be powering through the list and on the "Restructuring" phase, but that may be wishful thinking. My ego thinks I'm much "further along" than I am. Just be here now. I am where I am. 

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Just want to note that I feel I DEFINITELY can relate to the Princess Code description. No bueno. God please save me from myself!!!!!

The Princess Code Narcisstic Profile

1. Astral fantasy that the Knight in Shining Armor will save her from doom, poverty, low status and unhappiness.

2. Superior beliefs that she is a “Princess” and then “Queen” thus she makes demands of self-entitled treatment.

3. Beliefs she has to manipulate the male target of her “Knight Fantasy” in order to marry her and become the “King”. Sexual manipulation is common.

4. Generally feels that she is deserving of wealth, jewels or status symbols and will blame or use others to get these material goods.

5. General disregard for others, even those she is close with, in the relentless pursuit of her fantasies and personal goals.

6. Cosmetic surgery or extreme manipulation methods to make her appear to be a “princess” to others.

7. Spin doctors the reality (creates self-promotion stories) to suit her image of perfection, or image based on her reality bubble which is based in delusion.

8. Narcissism through emotional fracturing is masking her outward superiority complex and potentially, tantrums, hysterics and upheavals.

9. Refuses to listen to facts and may lash out when her delusion or reality bubble is being threatened.

10. Key themes: manipulator, seducer, jezebel, Femme Fatale, Victim-Victimizer, lasher/slasher, guilt trip punisher, man-eater, strings attached, conditional