Guard your heart

 Post response to Lisa's "Preserving our Sacred Heart" post:

Thank you so much for this educational and encouraging information, Lisa! I loved the HeartMath video and the session transcript and reading what everyone shared. Sabine, I can relate so much to what you have been experiencing too. I had what I now look back on as a heart opening and upgrade in the fall of 2019. I had that breathlessness and chest pains and high blood pressure for months (sometimes it got really low too) ...it was scary. In 2017 my EKG changed to "abnormal" so that was a factor that freaked me out too. (But again, I think it was aligned with planetary shifts and the ascension symptoms which have been rocking my body for many years.) 

Anyway, in 2019 I was still running to the hospital for help... going quite regularly... and they never found any heart attacks or anything but did send me to a cardiologist who gave me some tests and blood pressure pills. (Luckily God sent help to keep me from taking those devils... I have enough neurotoxins to clear!) Anyway, that whole rigamarole brought me to the end of my rope and eventually I felt there was nothing else to do other than just let myself die.

That was the craziest experience of my life to date... laying on my bed and allowing my death....surrendering into (what felt like) a heart attack. I just let it take me... it burned through my heart and radiated up my neck, head and arms. I guess it's like birth pains which they say you can't really remember when you look back, but I hold the mental construct about how intense and painful that experience was. The crazy thing was that I didn't expire!! And it was the beginning of my next chapter. A couple weeks later I joined ES and off I went! Whee! 

"Guard your heart above all else for it is the wellspring of life."  (Proverbs 4:23)

Regarding the emotional aspects of the heart, I've heard (and stood on my soapbox declaring) this phrase above for a big chunk of my life. Despite that, I continued to sustain (allow...create) damage. I see now how the "guarding" of the heart can also manifest as putting up walls and shutting it down. I guess there is a difference between guarding from the heartset of the spirits of Christ (discipline, purity, kindness, humility etc.) and guarding from negative ego. 

This year I seem to be going through another level of heart opening and upgrade, presumably my permanent seed atom is coming online and/or working out some glitches in the process of embodying my Crystal Lotus Heart. I'm also clearing some old wounds, reversals and a giant shard.

My circulatory system is a trigger and I know it's because I'm sensitive to my connection to the earth's macrocosm (from the space of my microcosm). My "vein anxiety" has come back in a big way. It comes and goes but has been on high alert lately. I can just see everyone's veins and my own veins and it triggers fear in me. I worry whether they are working properly and see distortions. I know this is mental body fear programming and am grateful for the opportunity to PRACTICE witnessing with neutrality and brining love to the fear and the veins... so that's just my work now. And continuing to clear blood covenants . 

Thank you for the space to process this and grateful for the resources and encouragement which is perfectly aligned, as usual. 

Katie's post with the Heart Scar Clearing was really helpful too!